Black thoughts.

Sometimes you rely too much on people. Sometimes you need to, it's like religion, you need it. But just as putting faith in God and blaming him for not doing things according to your plan, you get disappointed with people in whom you blindly rely on and put so much expectations on one's actions and attitudes. Today I felt hit by a tsunami. Suddenly I had no "job", no boyfriend, no friends and no family to talk to, to cry on their shoulder, to feel safe just for the fact that you're being held at that moment. And the worst part is that when you actually gather the strength to call them, they don't even have a clue of what you are going through and you feel guilty to drag them into your "not-so-perfect" world, or you just feel ashamed and have no guts to admit you are a complete failure. Then when you most need the people you love, you make an effort not to, and let them live their lives without concerning about yours. At the end of the day, the only one that you're disappointed with is YOURSELF.